these are a few of my favorite things: Merisik

So after 7 years of being together, his mum suddenly told him one day that she wants to bring wawa (his grandmother) to see my parents to discuss the Merisik. According to the future MIL, wawa has certain traditions when it comes to these things and that they should meet at a place outside of the house to discuss the Merisik before the actual Merisik. Our parents had met and known each other since the first couple of years of us being together, and us getting married is nothing of a surprise, I would even say inevitable, but all in the name of tradition, they met at Coffee Bean, Subang Parade (wouldn't say that the Coffee Bean suits the whole "traditional" concept but I guess nowadays you can only follow so much of the malay tradition kan?). They agreed for the Merisik to be on the 10th of April 2010 in conjunction with Aliff's 25th birthday. They also agreed that the Bertunang will be somewhere in July and that we will be engaged for one year. [Their discussion that day are actually pre-agreed by me and Aliff - the dates were decided by us based on our schedules, hence, their "meeting" that day was actually just a formality for wawa's sake :) ].

So, Aliff's parents were bringing 10 people who are the closest uncles and aunts of Aliff. And as usual, due to the size of my mum's family, our side would be about 20+ people. I always thought that Merisik only involved the parents of the couple and maybe the grandparents. And that "meeting" at Coffee Bean would have been the Merisik had it been done at home. For Kakmira's "Merisik", if I remember correctly, was attended by close to 100 people (kan?), with canopies outside the house and catering complete with hantarans from both sides of the family. I thought that her "Merisik" was more like the "Bertunang", but without the diamond ring. But that was her MIL's kind of Merisik. Kakmira didn't have a Bertunang. Anyhow, ikut je lah orang tua kan. As long as they are happy. I guess the malay traditions varies and are interpreted differently among the different families and that what is being practiced nowadays are mere formalities. My family is not so traditional, especially my mother, so we just follow what the guy's side wants to do.

Preparations for the Merisik was nothing to be stressed about - we decided that it was going to be high tea, with light refreshments, just a simple get together.

Food - Eventhough it was supposed to be light refreshments - high tea-concept, for my family, food is never "light". My mum made macaronies and spaghetti. My dad bought sate. We ordered roti jala, poppiya goreng and some aunts brought kuih. For desert, my mum also made bubur kacang and fruits were served.

Aunty Judy (Kakmira's MIL) helping setting up the food on the buffet table

Ensemble - At first I thought I'd just wear a simple kurung, something I already have in the closet. I thought yellow would be sweet. Turns out, I didn't have a yellow-simple-kurung. Others might have just changed the color and find any other nice kurung. But being "me", I HAD to wear a yellow kurung. heeee. So i bought 4 metres of light yellow chiffon and sent it to my beloved Cindy (my tailor of almost 20 years).

This is one of the few pictures of me in full.

Make Up/Hair - No professionals. Just simple and light make up that I did myself and later touched-up by ibu. For hair, initially I planned to go to Cut N Blow, the saloon near my house which I usually frequent. I just wanted a straight hair-blow which I could do myself as it's a daily routine for me, but I just like people washing my hair and the complimentary light massage that they would do. Tapi, we went off schedule that morning, and by the time I was free to go, there was not a single car at home (everyone went out to get stuff; bapak went to get the sate, Adri went to get fold tables, Kakmira went to get extra plates and table cloth from her house, Syida went to get the cake for Aliff - I think Kakmira only brought home one car that weekend so one of them used my car). So, I ended up doing my own hair - mula-mula macam merajuk, then while blowing my hair, I thought it's a small thing lah. Jangan mengada. Haha.

Hantaran - There wasn't any hantaran per se, Aliff's side would be bringing the ring and a cake. So it was only proper for the girl's side to balas - we gave a basket of fruits and a tray of pineapple tart that an aunt made.

Decorations - Nothing much. The day before the Merisik I went to Floristika, Bangsar to get some flowers for centrepieces and the side table to where I'll be sitting when wawa sarung the ring.

Above: Sweet Williams and Baby's Breath for the centrepieces
Below: Carnations, Chrysanthemums, Ping-Pong Flowers (or so they are called) and Daisies for the side table

So the event started with the arrival of Aliff's family at about 5pm. Then the uncles started discussing about the Merisik; details of engagement, wedding etc - Then I was called down to make sure that they are talking about the right girl. Ahaha. Then, wawa sarung cincin. Followed by the doa. Aliff came after that and everyone then proceeded to our porch area to eat. Later we surprised Aliff with a birthday cake. That was it. Nice and simple, just the way i like it.

These are a few of the pictures taken that day.

L: Arrival of Aliff's family - Wawa in the wheel chair with Mummy Dek, Aliff's youngest aunt.
R: Uncles discussing and I was told there was exchange of pantun-s.

L: Aliff's aunts
R: My aunts

L: Alia, Adik and Kakmira
R: Lulu Alani

Me, eavesdropping :)

It's time to go down

The Ring - was told that for Merisik it had to be belah rotan. Is is usually gold, but I prefer white gold :)

Sarung Cincin

This is Adri my BIL, being very helpful :)

My guests across the ocean in the land down under via Skype. Don't you love technology :)
L: Syida's other half, and future BIL, Asyraf
R: Kakak - best friends even before birth

The very-very helpful helpers. Thank you bibik-bibik dan kakak-kakak!
L-R: Kak Su (My grandmother's right wing), Cik Kakak/Kak Huriah a.k.a Chief (the bestest - have been with us for 8 years now), Kak Su (my aunt's helper), Bibik Muammah (the latest addition-Lulu Alani's bestfriend) and Bibik Gemuk/Bibik Urut (Bestfriend Kak Huriah)