2 Weekends to the Big Day

2 more weekends left before the Big Day. How do I feel? FREAKING NERVOUS. Not particularly on the part of being married and the marriage after (for now atleast) because I dont foresee a HUGE change, other than the fact that I will be living in 2 houses, one of which is the Parents-in-Law's house (which also gets me nervous at times). Me and Aliff will be staying at our parents' houses first until we get a place on our own. So, anyway, what gets me nervous is the ENDLESS things that still need to be done. This is when a Wedding Planner will come in handy. Oh Well.

Recap of last week:

1. Grooms Wear for Nikah & Bride's Reception- Aliff had picked up his baju melayu for the nikah and the suit for the reception dinner. Next: butang baju melayu for his nikah baju melayu.

2. Hantaran - I think me and Aliff have finished getting all the things to be placed on the hantaran dulang. Aliff got his shoes from Jakarta. We also got his ring, which needs to be refitted, scheduled to be ready sometime next week I think. We also got the tie and the shirt for the hantaran (which he will be wearing for the reception). Next: cufflinks and the perishables, like the sireh junjung, fruits, cake and chocolates.

3. Baju Pengantin for Groom's Reception -  We will be going traditional, adorning silverish creme songkets. The MIL got the songkets from Indonesia and we have sent them to a tailor in Subang. It is quite last minute, but they said they can do it within the time we wanted. Mine will be ready on the 11th of June and Aliff's probably the week after. The look we're going for:

Next: Getting accesories for the Bride's ensemble; the headpiece, the ankle bracelet, the three tier necklace etc. Since I'm wearing a baju kurung, don't know whether the belt is suitable or not. Either way, I'm so excited to be wearing all these traditional accessories! Bila lagi? :)

L: source  R: source
Because my attire would be a simple kurung, I think the left one might be a tad to simple, but the the one in right might be too overwhelming. The one in right is called the "Sanggul Lintang" - something I have just learned :)

source
I think this piece might be what I'm looking for.



The three-tier-necklace which is called the "Dokoh"
source

The ankle bracelet a.k.a gelang kaki

4. Bridal Shower! My lovely varsity friends threw me a beautiful tea-party-bridal-shower at the most perfect place; Carcosa Seri Negara, the place I've always dreamt of having my wedding...oh well, anyway, it was so much fun and beautiful. Unexpectedly cried while giving the coerced-bridal speech. Will talk about this in a seperate post :)

Ok, so what I am planning to do this week:

1. Managing the Guestlist. Everyday we will receive the RSVP cards in our mail (which is so exciting), and even more exciting when the boxes "hadir" is ticked. But, having people RSVP-ing as not attending is actually a slight relief because the number of cards issued out are more than the seats allocated, BUT even so, I get a tinge of sadness when I see the box "tidak dapat hadir" is ticked even if I dont even know the person (eg; friends of the parents). Hahaha. Anyway, will have to sort out the actual numbers and arrange seatings this weekend. Thank you to those who have RSVP-ed. Tho those yang belum RSVP, pleaseeee do so, it will be really helpful so we can know the actual numbers and not waste or worse, have short of seats. We've provided the stamps and the envelope, all you have to do is fill in your name, tick and post it ............

2. Song List. So, I have been compiling the song list since 2 weeks ago, and this is one of the MOST fun thing to do. Listening to beautiful songs is just the best! My song list consist of classic-jazzy love songs from Eric Clapton to Tony Bennet to Frank Sinatra to P Ramlee. Classics are the best! I am also very fortunate to have my friend, Maria to sing me a few tunes. Her voice is to die for! First time I heard her sang was at a karaoke birthday party where she sang "Listen" by Beyonce. Ya Allah, sedapnyaaaaaaa. If the song wasn't such a sad song I would want her to sing it at my wedding. But I found the perfect song she can sing, "At Last", sang by Etta James and covered again by Beyonce. A compulsory song for my wedding! Maria will also be singing 2 more songs, yet to be finalised; either "A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson, "Wonderful Tonight" by Eric Clapton, "The Way You Look Tonight" by Tony Bennet, "Aku Cinta Padamu" by Sheila Majid and "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" by the Platters. And tentatively, Kakmira will be singing a duet with Adri "Sudah Kahwin Ke Belum" by Saloma and Ahmad Daud. They sang this once while were karaoke-ing one time and I was like, you two MUST sing this song at my wedding. The song's really cute! And a special peformance by a special someone (don't get too excited, its not an artist) but lets keep this a surprise :) All this are just plans, kita hanya merancang, so HOPEFULLY by next week we can finalise all the wedding singers :) Other than that, we are going to have a band play at my wedding. The band that was booked was Bapak's choice - it's his office's band, I've actually never seen them perform and I dont know what kind of songs they can play. But according to Ibu, they are quite good. Bapak has asked (and repeatedly reminded) me to send them the list of songs that I want them to play so they can rehearse. So that I MUST do this week, or I'm going to get an earful from Bapak.

3. Cake. Yummmmsssss. I will be ordering 2 cakes; one for the hantaran and one for the reception dinner. I've actually already have the designs, which needs finalising this week. Aishah recommended me Madaboutcake. I've actually known about them and had asked for a quotation once. Their price seem reasonable and their designs are quite impressive. Thought of meeting them this weekend, but Aishah will not be free, so maybe somewhere this week on a weekday kot?

4. Hantaran. Fuhhhhhh. this is a toughie. I already have the concept that I want, but I've realised that I might need more stuff than expected and the materials that I need is quite hard to find. I bought some things weeks ago, for the prototype, but when I went to get them last week, they're out of stock. It's always like that. When you don't need them, they'll be everywhere you turn, but when you need them, they're not there. Haih. So, I have planned to get all the materials weeks ago, but my weekends are always full with other events. So, I hope this weekend I will be able to settle the hantaran trays once and for all.

5. Home/Tent Deco. So, I'm also doing this myself. I've already gotten most of the decorative items. There are a few more left. I'm planning to get them this weekend too while I look for the hantaran stuff.

6. Flowers/Bouquet. Yes I LOVE flowers and i love shopping for them. I will  probably drop by Floristika to order the flowers and have them deliver to me one day before the wedding or I'll get someone to pick them up for me. I am planning to get red carnations and roses for the centrepieces and for the mini-pelamin. Some white chrysantemums, roses, orchids and hydrangeas for the sireh junjung. Some pastel colored flowers like eustoma, hydrangeas, carnations, sweet williams, and lavender for the bridal room. And ofcourse Casa Lilies for they bring the most beautiful ambience. I wonder if Floristika has peonies and gardenias. What else? My pelamin maker will be making my bridal bouquet for the reception. For the nikah, I'm not sure yet, whether to get him do it for me or do it myself. I'll probably have white orchids which is one of my favorite flowers, or a combination of pastel colored flowers to match my bridesmaids who will be wearing pastel pink, yellow and peach kaftans...come to think of it, a bouquet of yellow flowers may look really nice, no? hmmmm. Something I need to think about. Oh, I need to get flowers for the bridesmaids hand bouquet for the reception. I'll probably use lavenders cause they'll be wearing maroon/royal purple dresses. Wow, how much are these going to cost me? Yikes.

The things listed above (minus the guestlist part) are actually the best parts which I look forward to and enjoy in wedding planning.

To Do:

1. Bridal Wear - haish, tak settle-settle lagi. The most important part of the wedding. Hopefully, by this week I get to see it! Excited + Nervous + Anxious + Scared + Happy + Every other emotion you can think of.

2. Nikah Shoes - I'm looking for a white peep toe heels. Probably with white lace or flowers or ribbon ... something which is very .... bridal ....

have been looking high and low, but I've not found the perfect one yet. Or maybe should I get a hot pink heel?

Hmmm...

3. Flow of Event - to appoint a floor manager for both events.

4. Pre Wedding Photoshoot and Videoshoot - these are the two things I did not plan to do, cause I dont really like to do the props-acting stuff ...but I guess I am doing it...hahaha...because;

- the photoshoot was actually Aliff's uncle's request...he takes pictures as a hobby and he wanted to take our pre-wedding photos. His idea is just to take casual pictures of the both of us, in casual wear, he specifically said jeans and white shirts, no make up, no props whatsoever. I'm ok with that...as long as we dont have to do awkward poses...ahaha Uncle Osman is cool, so I'm sure it will be lovely and not cheesy.

- the videoshoot, is actually MY idea...ahahahha...I fell in love with Nicole Kidman's Omega advertisement, and thought of doing something similar...ahahhahahahhahahah...not sure if it will materialise though...will be meeting the videographer on the 5th of June to discuss the theme and idea of the shoot. Hopefully it will turn out well.

Both will be done on the last weekend before the wedding because of Aliff's "busy" schedule.

5. MOH and Bridesmaid kaftan - For the Nikah, family members will be wearing pastel pink/blue/purple while my Bridesmaids will be wearing pastel peach/pink/yellow kaftans.

color palette for the family

color palette for the Bridesmaids

My MOH has not gotten her kaftan for the nikah yet, as she will only be arriving in Malaysia from Australia on the 12th of June. So I'm thinking to go look for it with her. I also  need to get a yellow kaftan for one of my bridesmaid (Jihan!) who will be arriving in Malaysia on the 13th of June from the UK.

6. Spa, Mani-Padi and Brazilian - I have not gotten the chance to find time to go to a really relaxing spa! A MUST DO before the wedding. Will probably go with my MOH/Bridesmaids/Sisters the weekend before the wedding! Because I will be doing quite a bit of decorating/flower arranging for the wedding, I'll go for the mani padi the day before the wedding. Brazilian.....hmmmmmmm? Never done it before. Planned to do it once before the wedding so I'll know what to expect when I actually do it for the wedding...tapi....hmmmmm....see how...ahahahha...

7. Malam Berinai - Ooooohhhhh I need to get a white kaftan for the berinai! Shoots. Probably too late to get materials and send it for tailoring...which means I need to get a ready made...


something like this will be nice
source

 8. Inai - speaking of berinai, I also need to find someone to do the inai and henna. But I'm actually thinking of NOT doing the inai and henna at all, for the nikah and reception, but I'll do it for Aliff's reception...If I wont be wearing inai, than what is the Malam Berinai for? Hahahha...just for fun, get all the ladies to come the night before and have a small gathering, last touch ups, take pictures....hmmm....this needs to be revisited.

What else? Mesti banyak lagi ni...tak teringat je lagi....See why I'm nervous? Every morning for the past week, after I wake up while brushing my teeth I feel like throwing up. Boleh tak?

So many things to do this weekend. I hope time is on my side.

Toodles.

Preparations for the Engagement: The day before

The last few things that needed to be done was the pelamin, the centrepieces and cleaning.

Cleaning. My room was a mess, with all the magazines, and the un-hanged clothes, the dust. I've repainted some furnitures of the room to white and needed a white-framed-mirror for the dressing table. One day I came home and saw this lovely mirror that my parents bought for me as a gift :) Saved  my $$. yeay. My mum also bought new white sheets for the bed. Kak Huriah helped me with the vacuuming and dusting off the dusts.

Centrepieces. I bought the flowers from Floristika, Bangsar on Thursday evening (29.7.2010). I went after work and met Kakmira and Syida at Jalan Telawi, Bangsar. The arrangement was for me to park at Bangsar Village and Kakmira and Syida would pick me up. I asked them to meet me there because I wanted to get some threading done heee. Well, my phone battery died that day, so I had to walk, in heels, around Jalan Telawi to find a public phone to call them. Which was really difficult, because who uses public phones nowadays? Anyway, I managed to find a working public phone and told them the actual place where we would meet. So they picked me up and we went to Floristika. I chose a range of different types of flowers and colors - roses, carnations, hydrangeas, lavenders, sweet williams, sundal malam, chrysantemums, baby breaths and some others I dont know the name of. It was sooooooo much fun to shop for flowers.

When we got home, I put the flowers in buckets of water and started on the centrepieces. I didnt know that it would take a long time to finish. Ahhhh... Thursday night I slept at 2am. The next day I started early and finished at about 10pm. Phewwww.

Here are some of the centrepieces that I did. I also did the flowers for the room and other parts of the house.

                                           

Pelamin. I planned to have a simple pelamin for the sarung cincin. Since for the Merisik, it was done with me on the chair, I thought this time I would do it with me sitting down bersimpuh all lovely. Ahahah. So, we asked the canopy people to provide us a mini platform. They sent it the same day they put up the canopies, which was on Friday, the day before the Engagement. The platform turned out to be bigger than expected, but its ok. I covered the platform with light brown material that I bought from Nagoya. We put the wooden - i don't know what it is called - penghadang? divider? - whatever lah, as the backdrop for the pelamin. Then we laid down Kakmira's fluffy brown carpet and put a thin mattress in the middle and arranged throw pillows over it. Initially, I planned to arrange lavenders, purple chrysanthemums and sundal malam along the top of the wooden-penghadang/divider once I finished with the centrepieces. But that got off tracked, and I was toooo tired once I was done with the centrepieces. So Kakmira placed the leftover blue hydrangeas there instead. I bought a pair of blue-cotton-embroidered umbrella and Kakmira placed it at the 2 ends of the wooden-penghadang/divider.
                      

                                                                                         

That Friday night, some of my aunts and uncles and cousins came by to help out with anything else that needed to be done. The only thing that was left was to fill in the gift bags that my mum bought at Nilai 3 with yassins and hand-fans that my parents bought at the last minute at a reststop somewhere in Johor or Melaka when they were on their way back from picking up my paternal grandparents from my kampung in Johor :) I was happy with only the yassins, but the gift bags were sponsored by the parents, so I'm ok with whatever they want to put inside it, as long as it is not my $$. :) :). The fans were ultra cute and the aunts had fun reserving the fans that they want for themselves.



 

 

                 

Special thanx to my lovely and wonderful family, aunts and uncles, cousins, especially my strongest workforce, Kakmira, Syida, Ibu, KakHuriah, Adri and Han and Lulu and Bapak (The last four ni cheating sikit kadang-kadang - as you can see from the last 2 pictures ahaha) for putting up with my orders and pettiness. Love u guys to bitssssss!!

The Merisik - 10.4.2010

So after 7 years of being together, his mum suddenly told him one day that she wants to bring wawa (his grandmother) to see my parents to discuss the Merisik. According to the future MIL, wawa has certain traditions when it comes to these things and that they should meet at a place outside of the house to discuss the Merisik before the actual Merisik. Our parents had met and known each other since the first couple of years of us being together, and us getting married is nothing of a surprise, I would even say inevitable, but all in the name of tradition, they met at Coffee Bean, Subang Parade (wouldn't say that the Coffee Bean suits the whole "traditional" concept but I guess nowadays you can only follow so much of the malay tradition kan?). They agreed for the Merisik to be on the 10th of April 2010 in conjunction with Aliff's 25th birthday. They also agreed that the Bertunang will be somewhere in July and that we will be engaged for one year. [Their discussion that day are actually pre-agreed by me and Aliff - the dates were decided by us based on our schedules, hence, their "meeting" that day was actually just a formality for wawa's sake :) ].

So, Aliff's parents were bringing 10 people who are the closest uncles and aunts of Aliff. And as usual, due to the size of my mum's family, our side would be about 20+ people. I always thought that Merisik only involved the parents of the couple and maybe the grandparents. And that "meeting" at Coffee Bean would have been the Merisik had it been done at home. For Kakmira's "Merisik", if I remember correctly, was attended by close to  100 people (kan?), with canopies outside the house and catering complete with  hantarans from both sides of the family. I thought that her "Merisik" was more like the "Bertunang", but without the diamond ring. But that was her MIL's kind of Merisik. Kakmira didn't have a Bertunang. Anyhow, ikut je lah orang tua kan. As long as they are happy. I guess the malay traditions varies and are interpreted differently among the different families and that what is being practiced nowadays are mere formalities. My family is not so traditional, especially my mother, so we just follow what the guy's side wants to do.

Preparations for the Merisik was nothing to be stressed about  - we decided that it was going to be high tea, with light refreshments, just a simple get together.

Food - Eventhough it was supposed to be light refreshments - high tea-concept, for my family, food is never "light". My mum made macaronies and spaghetti. My dad bought sate. We ordered roti jala, poppiya goreng and some aunts brought kuih. For desert, my mum also made bubur kacang and fruits were served.



Aunty Judy (Kakmira's MIL) helping setting up the food on the buffet table



Ensemble - At first I thought I'd just wear a simple kurung, something I already have in the closet. I thought yellow would be sweet. Turns out, I didn't have a yellow-simple-kurung. Others might have just changed the color and  find any other nice kurung. But being "me", I HAD to wear a yellow kurung. heeee. So i bought 4 metres of light yellow chiffon and sent it to my beloved Cindy (my tailor of almost 20 years).



This is one of the few pictures of me in full.



Make Up/Hair - No professionals. Just simple and light make up that I did myself and later touched-up by ibu. For hair, initially I planned to go to Cut N Blow, the saloon near my house which I usually frequent. I just wanted a straight hair-blow which I could do myself as it's a daily routine for me, but I just like people washing my hair and the complimentary light massage that they would do. Tapi, we went off schedule that morning, and by the time I was free to go, there was not a single car at home (everyone went out to get stuff; bapak went to get the sate, Adri went to get fold tables, Kakmira went to get extra plates and table cloth from her house, Syida went to get the cake for Aliff - I think Kakmira only brought home one car that weekend so one of them used my car). So, I ended up doing my own hair - mula-mula macam merajuk, then while blowing my hair, I thought it's a small thing lah. Jangan mengada. Haha.



Hantaran - There wasn't any hantaran per se, Aliff's side would be bringing the ring and a cake. So it was only proper for the girl's side to balas - we gave a basket of fruits and a tray of pineapple tart that an aunt made.

Decorations - Nothing much. The day before the Merisik I went to Floristika, Bangsar to get some flowers for centrepieces and the side table to where I'll be sitting when wawa sarung the ring.

Above: Sweet Williams and Baby's Breath for the centrepieces
Below: Carnations, Chrysanthemums, Ping-Pong Flowers (or so they are called) and Daisies for the side table  

So the event started with the arrival of Aliff's family at about 5pm. Then the uncles started discussing about the Merisik; details of engagement, wedding etc - Then I was called down to make sure that they are talking about the right girl. Ahaha. Then, wawa sarung cincin. Followed by the doa. Aliff came after that and everyone then proceeded to our porch area to eat. Later we surprised Aliff with a birthday cake. That was it. Nice and simple, just the way i like it.

These are a few of the pictures taken that day. 



L: Arrival of Aliff's family - Wawa in the wheel chair with Mummy Dek, Aliff's youngest aunt.
R: Uncles discussing and I was told there was exchange of  pantun-s.



L: Aliff's aunts
R: My aunts



L: Alia, Adik and Kakmira
R: Lulu Alani

Me, eavesdropping :)

It's time to go down

The Ring - was told that for Merisik it had to be belah rotan. Is is usually gold, but I prefer white gold :) 

Sarung Cincin

This is Adri my BIL, being very helpful :)

My guests across the ocean in the land down under via Skype. Don't you love technology :)
L: Syida's other half, and future BIL, Asyraf
R: Kakak - best friends even before birth

The very-very helpful helpers. Thank you bibik-bibik dan kakak-kakak!
L-R: Kak Su (My grandmother's right wing), Cik Kakak/Kak Huriah a.k.a Chief (the bestest - have been with us for 8 years now), Kak Su (my aunt's helper), Bibik Muammah (the latest addition-Lulu Alani's bestfriend) and Bibik Gemuk/Bibik Urut (Bestfriend Kak Huriah)

Future MIL and me. Matching yellow :)

The family

Aliff's entourage balik - Wawa waving so adorably.